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Aug 19, 2012

Eid Mubarak: 5 Tips To Get More Money(Eidi) This Year


Mission Eidi, starting from 0800 hours onward.
As Eid brings lot of joys and happiness to the Muslims all over the world but it also brings one most important thing of them all, that is “The Eidi” a.k.a Rokra /maal / Eid Gifts (if being burger). As the global recession is getting worst, this mission is getting risky and tough day by day. So my Loteroo, we have to improve our skills to grab more of the Eidi without wasting much time on a single target.

Right now our Eidi points are zero, although people living in Middle East and other areas where Eid was today their Eidi points must be on a GO.
This time in Pakistan we are all set for Mission Eidi to begin. Thank God there has been a ban on the cell phone services in Pakistan a night before Eid so that an unknown guy who send me a creepy SMS having a Rupee made of inverted commas and dots with a text in bottom "ye lo eidi aish karo,seriously WTH" and he always do this. Allah smjhay ga tujhay 03333128807 jiska bhi number ha ye...

(Chalo meraaaa bhai *like conductor* ) Here are the ways to improve your skills to get more Eideeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh (say it like sabzi wala, sabzeeeeeaaaaahh).
  1. Go to all of your relatives even the far far far.. (that was echo my room is pretty empty :P) uncles.
  2. Looking good is important, and more important than looking good is having the expressions (shakal say hi mazloom lagna chahye). Here is figure 1A on the right to demonstrate perfect Eidi expressions.
  3. Be extra polite (aray uncle sheer khorma liay naa,aray uncle kabab lijiay na) and when the target is trapped, bang !! (ALLAH hu Akbar,No mercy !! )
  4. Remind and brag about how the other uncle gave more eidi (deliberately talking infront of the uncle who is about to give eidi, Yaar wo Ajmal k mamu nay mjhay 1000rs diay ha..and abto 20rs kon pagal deta ha yaar). Trust me boyses and Girlses, you have got the target.
  5. Give eidi to rich uncle sons which are always less in numbers (arey, arey kitna pyara bacha ha, ye lo beata Eidi....inka 1 ha hamaray 8, FATALITY \m/ )
And now the most deadly weapon ever made in the history of Grabbing Eidi, do use it properly my fellows...and it is so important that i actually forgot to number it :P

                                             “Assalam o Alikum” 

This is the deadliest of all, my Eidi Looteroo. Keep this weapon as your last move and when ever there is a need of it, used it in a “burst mode” until the targets gets sure of your presence and intentions and put his hands in pocket to give the Eideeeeeaaaahhhhhh.. (Mission Accomplished Bro, Ja aish kar ab )

So the game is on, score more and share with us. Also tell us your creative Eidi looto trick... Lotoooooeeeaaahhhh (same like sabziwala, say it loud man,the war in ON) :D

p.s dont over do the salam move it can have some adverse effects, getting a  Kara-ra Chappait is one of them, trust me !! : /  
See Also: How Nasri Celebrated Eid?

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